CHAPTER 80
NHLANGANO MAVIMBELA

“You helped him out daddy so why is he still
here?” I overhear Zekhethelo ask as I’m about
to step into the study to talk to her father.
I have been sleeping at her house since the
day her father came to help me out with the
misunderstanding that happened with the
police. They caught me trying to climb over
the gate and assumed that I was up to no
good. I tried explaining that it’s my father’s
house but they wouldn’t believe me because I
had no key and no one was home.
I called my aunt but she didn’t answer her
phone. They took me to the holding cell and
for a couple of days I tried to contact my
family but all of their phones were off. The
cops also went back to the house but they
found no one. I had no other choice but to call
one of the two people I hate with all my
heart, Khwezi. I just wanted her to track
down my family and inform them of the
situation I found myself in. That’s the least
she could do after everything she did to me,
but her phone was answered by Zekhethelo’s
father. I explained my situation to him and
later that day he came and helped me clear
everything with the cops.
When we got to his house we found Ze, I
wasn’t expecting to see her there because
schools aren’t on recess yet. Her father
explained that he had to go get her after
Khwezi came to him and told him Zekhethelo
was in some sort of danger. She told her ex
husband the whole truth and then asked for
help. He arranged for her to go to rehab and
get her shit together for the sake of their
daughter.
After everything I’ve done to his daughter,
Ze’s father has been very understanding of my
situation. He went to Mphikeleli’s house with
me to get my things and invited me stay with
them until we can get my father on the
phone. I plan to go down to Mahlabathini next
week if I still don’t get through to them via
call. I want to fix my relationship with my
family and ask for their forgiveness. This
whole thing has taught me to never put
anyone else before them and that no one will
love me or want what is best for me as much
as they do.
I walk away from the study door and head to
the back of the house to smoke. It’s a habit I
need to quit if I still want a career as a
football player. As much as it clears my head I
know I have to stop smoking and lead a
healthy lifestyle like I did before being mixed
up with the devil that is Mphikeleli.
My phone rings in my pocket and I quickly
take it out, an unsaved number. My heart
starts thumping in my chest, I’m hoping it’s
my father or my aunt. I really need to see
them and make things between us alright. I
cannot continue living with this guilt. For
their forgiveness I am willing to jump through
every hoop they set for me.
“Hello,” I answer.
“Nhlaks, ntwana yami,” oh fuck no!
I thought I made myself clear to this guy the
day I went to get my things at his apartment.
I want absolutely nothing to do with him. “I
blocked your number for a reason, Mphikeleli,”
he heaves a sigh.
“I know I fucked up but please know that I
want to be your dad. Nhlangano, I don’t want
to lose you the same way I lost your mother. I
know Busi would want us to be together and
have a healthy father and son relationship,”
mihlola yam ke le!
“You have the nerve to talk about my mother
after everything you put her through. She
must be turning in her grave, mad at me for
hurting the two people that loved me from
the first day I came into this world.
Mphikeleli, do not call this number again. You
are dead to me.” I hung up the phone and drop
my head. He ruined my life just like he ruined
my mothers. How did I let this man turn my
once perfect life into a mess?
“Karma came knocking early,” I turn and find
Zekhethelo standing by the corner of the
house. She has a disgusted look on her face.
“You deserve all the shit you’re going through,
Nhlangano. This experience will teach you not
to hurt people who genuinely love and care
for you,” her words might hurt but she’s right,
I do deserve it all.
“Once upon a time those gorgeous eyes were
full of love when they looked at me. I am
really sorry for everything, Ze. I truly love you
and I was a fool for looking at another girl,” I
say, with the hope that she will one day find
it in her heart to forgive me.
She chuckles, “By another girl you mean my
mother?” I didn’t know that fact when I
started sleeping with Khwezi, but that won’t
earn me any points.
“I’m sorry babe.” She flares her nose.
“Babe? Fuck you dude. And please leave my
house, go back to that drug dealing pimp and
be his problem. You don’t deserve any
kindness from my dad and Mr. Mavimbela
deserves better than an ungrateful brat that
shoved his love back at him when he thought
he found better,” if words had the power to
kill a person, I swear I would have dropped
dead right this minute.
“Ze, that’s enough!” her father roars and we
both turn to look at him.
“It’s okay, I deserve to hear everything she’s
saying,” he shakes his head.
“You’re already paying for your bad decisions.
There’s no need for her to beat you when
you’re already down.” He’s a kind man.
KHETHIWE “MAZIKODE” MAVIMBELA
Thalente comes back with the tray of food
and my heart drops into my stomach. This is
the lowest I have ever seen my son.
Shlobosenkosi always knows how to deal with
things; through every situation he has
managed to keep his head above water but
now he’s drowning and I don’t think he’s
trying to save himself. I am afraid for my only
surviving child, I’m scared that if we don’t
help him out of this deep dark pit we will lose
him forever.
It has been four days since the doctor
confirmed that Naledi is indeed his biological
daughter. Londeka came and performed all
the necessary rituals and took them to the
river for cleansing. Londeka, Naledi and her
mothers left for Durban yesterday morning
and my son hasn’t come out of his room or
touched his food. I think Naledi leaving finally
made everything real for him. In his head
things still had a chance to take another turn
while they were still around each other.
This is the hardest thing I have ever had to
deal with as a mother and I can only imagine
how hard everything is on him.
I get up and take the tray from Thalente. He
has to eat or he will die of hunger, I cannot
lose another child. He’s all that I have and I
will fight to bring him back. It’s going to be
hard for him to accept that the woman he
loves and married is his daughter, but with
time and help from those doctors that
Thalente wants to be, he will get there.
His sister left the bedroom door ajar so I just
push it with my foot and walk inside. He’s
under the covers and I can hear his sniffles. A
mother cannot stand seeing her child feeling
so much pain, even if that child is now 49
years old. I place the tray on the bedside table
before settling on the edge of the bed and
rubbing his back in circles.
“You won’t believe it now but everything will
be okay my baby,” he cries harder at the
sound of my voice.
“It hurts so much mama. It feels like someone
opened up my chest and cut out my heart.
Why did this have to happen to me? I am a
good person, I don’t deserve this,” I bite my
lower lip to quieten my sobs.
I don’t want him to hear me crying, he needs
me to be strong for him.
“You know what the fucked up part is ma? I
cannot stop wanting her to be my wife. The
DNA results didn’t change anything and
Londeka’s cleansing and rituals didn’t remove
my need for her as a woman I want to love as
a wife and give many children. I will never see
Naledi as my daughter ma, never, and that
makes me a sick fuck!” he finally uncovers
himself and looks at me. His eyes are
bloodshot red, full of pain.
“She is the love of my life MaZikode,” he
whispers.
“I will not rush your healing process, Shlobo.
Feel it all so you can heal and pick up the
pieces of your life. Once that has happened
you will be able to look at Naledi and see
what you’re supposed to see,” he shakes his
head.
“You don’t understand ma, no one does,” he
mutters and gets out of bed. He opens the
wardrobe and takes out his travel bag and
starts throwing his clothes inside of it.
“Haibo! Where are you going?” I ask, panicked.
“I need to clear my head, ma. I just want to
be alone for some time,” I quickly get up from
the bed.
“Shlobo, you cannot be alone while dealing
with this. Please allow your sister and I to see
you through this,” I beg with a shaking voice.
I need to keep an eye on him, to make sure
that he eats, takes his bath and everything
else.
“Ma, I’m a big boy and I can take care of
myself,” I know that but right now he needs
all the support he can get.
“Okay, but please leave after a week. Let me
take care of you for a few days,” he doesn’t
answer me.
I watch him change into fresh clothes, then
opens the drawer and takes out his car key
and wallet.
“Can I please have my phone,” oh Jesu.
I took the phone so he doesn’t bother Naledi.
Communication will happen between myself,
Maswabi and Dzunisani. This is what is best
for them but now that he’s leaving I need to
give it to him so I can be able to reach him
for my peace of mind.
“I cannot force you to stay, Shlobo, but please
promise me that you will take care of
yourself and give Naledi the space she needs.
This whole thing is also hard on her,” he nods
but not convincingly.
“I hear you, ma. Can I have the phone now,” I
wipe my tears and walk out of his bedroom to
get his cellphone. Thalente is standing in the
corridor, biting her nail as tears glisten in her
eyes.
“Everything will be alright Thale. God and the
ancestors will see us through,” I pat her
shoulder before walking past her.